squash soliloquies and torani tirades
unsnackable vol. 79
I have spent my entire life obsessed with snacks, but writing this newsletter has placed me firmly in a constant state of snack-induced hypervigilance. I'm always thinking about things like the parallels between similar snacks from different parts of the world (Dutch Advocaat vs Puerto Rican Coquito, is Mountain Dew the American equivalent of Japanese Mitsuya Cider?), the rebranding quirks of international brands launching in America (Squashies, a foam gummy created by UK company Swizzles are branded/distributed as Smarties Swizzles in the US despite Smarties being a Nestle owned chocolate candy in the UK), and watching snack trends emerge-transmutate-die-reemerge (Can you draw a line from PB&Co's flavored peanut butter in the late 90s and early aughts to the inescapable Dubai Chocolate today?)
The ideas are too fragmented to be wedged into my (already) rambling thoughts in this newsletter, so I save my long-winded explanations for my notes app or for those unlucky enough to prompt me about one of my hyperfixations. I had to apologize for my three-minute rant when asked about the freeze-dried Skittles over the weekend.
What I think about the most is Squash. Not the vegetable, but the broad category of dilutable beverage concentrates (Sharbat, Cordial, etc). More precisely, I think about how every grievance I have with American beverage culture originates from America's lack of Squash or any meaningful equivalent.
The functional appeal of these beverage concentrates is that they can be diluted to taste, fruity, or flavorful without requiring full sweetness. Without a historical tradition of squash, there is likely less of an established consumer behavior of customizing sweetness in beverages. Most beverages are either sweetened or unsweetened, and "less sweet" often means sugar substitutes backfill a comparable sweetness level as the "sweet" options they replace. Many products exist in the amorphous space between those categories, some of which are quite delicious, but most of which are maddeningly mid and one that has earned my unceasing ire. Torani Syrup.
The last time I felt joy at the sight of a bottle of Torani syrup was in the late 90s. I was a library kid, and like cerulean, "Italian sodas" had diffused through the culinary ecosystem to the small co-franchised microcafé in the lobby of my suburban branch. Week after week, I would sneak glances at the bubbly radioactive glow of each soda, biding my time until I had the chance to taste. When I did, I was born anew. The abrasive carbonation and bright flavors inspired my own fizzy beverages, even as Italian sodas fell out of favor. Reveling in nostalgia and the economic liberties of adulthood, I bought a bottle a few years ago. Frankly, it was trash.
Gone were the fruity notes that would linger on the last ice cubes after I finished an Italian soda in a single continuous gulp, and in their place was a dull sweetness. Torani is now a shelf-stable simple syrup with an aroma instead of a flavor. My hunch was further confirmed after trying a "dirty soda" at a Swig copycat. I love sugar too much to accept when it is used as a blunt instrument instead of a gentle buttress to structure how you experience flavor.
My disdain grew as I started to make more syrups, and I took my syrup shelf worldwide. There is no limit to what you can steep or infuse into a simple, and any jam/jelly is a splash of warm water away from becoming a drink syrup, btw. To save you from the tedium of a Torani lifestyle, I am ignoring the long-standing format of this newsletter and sharing the details of my extensive drink syrup collection. Most are shelf-stable, many are currently unopened, and some live by the grace of sugar's preservative properties in my fridge. I use them in drinks, baking/cooking, and whenever I bust out my shaved ice machine. And most importantly, even though they are “sweet” I’m able to use them to create beverages that taste less sweet than most things I can pick up from the store.
the squash soliloquies
fruity
HARDERS HAWAII MANGO (Hawaii)- One of the most shockingly juicy mango flavors I have ever tried. Not quite "sucking the flesh off of a mango pit over the sink" juicy, but 4K quality mango-ness nonetheless. Harders uses local fruit and it adds a vividness to their syrups.
FABBRI MIXYBAR AMARENA (Italy)- I once stole most of the syrup from a container of Fabbri cherries for a recipe (extremely rude, but the flavor was worth the karmic debt). This protects me from summoning great misfortune upon myself and future generations.
CALPIS SUMMER PINEAPPLE (Japan)- Americans live in the shadow of the milk lobby and somehow refuse to let the light of yogurt and lactic acid beverages into their heart. Calpis syrup is magical in drinks, providing sweetness and tang alongside a textural richness that would otherwise require clarified dairy.
ROSE'S PEACH SYRUP (USA)- This is technically made by Dr. Pepper's conglomerate, but I was only able to try it two years after release by ordering from a restaurant supply website during a kitchen restock because it was always out of stock, so I don't feel like a sell-out by including it. It is an exact analogue for Rose's grenadine (complementary).
ASAHI HOTTO UME (Japan)- Designed to be served warm like tea, I swear this works similarly to raisins in carrot cake whenever I add it to other beverages. A splash provides depth and a foundation for other flavors to shine.
NAKAMURA KAKIGORI SYRUP MELON (Japan)- Melon is such a hyperlocalized flavor because it is a fruit that tastes like nothing unless it is served fully ripened. For this reason, Japan has both Melon Soda (fluorescent, blending the flavors of multiple melon varietals alongside a bit of a cream soda tang) and melon sodas (showcasing a singular type of melon, like Higo Green or Yubari ). In pursuit of the former, most of the syrups I've tried are closer to Korean Melona, which is an entirely different ballpark of flavor. This is the only syrup I've ever tried that nails the MOS Burger/Kissaten style classic Japanese Melon Soda flavor.
citrusy
ASAHI HOTTO HONEY LEMON (Japan) -One of the most annoying tropes of #social #media #posts about snacks and packaged goods in Japan is the presentation of innovation as surface-level abstractions, instead of intentional design that aims to fit into the rhythms of life. I first tried the RTD hotto honey lemon straight from a vending machine on a balmy day that turned glacial enough to leave my fingers too numb to get yen from my coin purse. The heated bottle warmed my hands, and drinking the perfectly steamy drink made me feel like I was a Beatrix Potter character being served a pure expression of love and care. I keep the bottled concentrate stocked to microdose that feeling all winter long.
KUSHINO FARM YUZU HONEY (Japan)- I have never spent more time dodging wasps than this summer. I believe it is because drinking this has instilled an inner glow that they can't ignore. This tastes like bottled sunshine by way of the Oita prefecture. Very random that I bought it at a bookstore alongside the small-press Dean & Deluca food mag.
TESSERIE PAMPLEMOUSSE ROSE (France)- I grabbed a bottle of this during an emotionally fraught grocery run in Montreal right before the pandemic lockdowns. It is a testament to the flavor that I have repurchased it despite the risk of triggering my neatly repressed memories for that time. It somehow balances the aroma of grapefruit zest and the bitterness of the fruit.
aromatic
ROOH-AFZA(Pakistan) -If there is an inverse of flavors that can only be described by naming their color, this is it. You take a journey from floral to fruity to herbal with a final destination of refreshment whenever you use this, but the route is never the same. I always grab a bottle of Rooh Afza, Uladag Gazos, Vimto (a blackcurrant, grape, and raspberry cordial I don't have but still recommend), or another favorite from the halal grocer on the way home from the farmers' market.
HARDERS HAWAII LI-HING (Hawaii)- There are four flavors of Harders Hawaii syrup on this list because I have ordered a four-pack of syrups, shipped from Hawaii with an average of 4 weeks of delivery time, once a year since 2021. Excessive, but necessary because Harders nails flavors that simply aren't available otherwise. They even go as far as offering both Li Hing syrup and a Crackseed Plum syrup, even though Crackseed Plums are used to make Li-Hing Powder, alongside licorice powder, sugar, and salt. I use this syrup like "fruit msg" to max out the flavor of seasonal fruit and fruit-forward drinks.
SUNTORY HOME DRINK DEKAVITA C (Japan)- This is technically a "functional" beverage that pairs royal jelly extract with various vitamins, but it tastes like a herb-infused honey with a touch of citrus that feels a bit virtuous when you drink it.
evocative
HARDERS HAWAII COLA (Hawaii) - Boring in comparison to some of the others on this list. This cordial provides a base for further customization with aromatics (pink peppercorn, candied ginger, shiso) or fruit (plums, citrus, berries) to create something more esoteric than any limited-edition flavor of Coke, regardless of the lofty naming conventions.
CHEERWINE SYRUP (North Carolina) - One of America's great hyper-regional sodas is still family-owned, and they celebrate this by making their fountain syrup available, affordable, and worthy of 48 distinct recipes (I would make all of them, to be clear). I first purchased this syrup to make German buttercream for a soda fountain-themed cake (there was also a Sprite masa harina sponge, cola pickled cherries, and blood orange fanta curd), and I've been forced to restock it a few times since then. It makes an insane espresso soda.
HARDERS HAWAII RAMUNE (Hawaii) - This syrup is a bridge between flavors easily replicated at home and the flavors of Japanese sodas, likely because it mimics both the gum syrups available at every coffee shop and the faintly bubblegum-berry flavor of the marble-encapsulated beverages. It also looks great mixed with seltzer and topped with a scoop of ice cream and a cherry to make a cream soda.
Now that you understand my drink syrup collection, you must be wondering how I use these syrups. For the drinks in delis I wrote about in the last unsnackable (that I've also been posting on Substack Notes), alongside a wide variety of other fun beverages.
I’m still figuring this out, but hopefully, you enjoyed v.79 of unsnackable.
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This is everything, thank you for sharing! I would love to hear your thoughts about freeze dried skittles, I'm in total ignorance!
Obsessed with that wee cherry glass! 🍒